The Sound of Silence - with my apologies to Simon and Garfunkel

(Sung to the tune of "Sound of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkel.)

 

Hello Quiet, my old friend.

It’s nice to be with you again.

I’m getting so much more accomplished…

…without my constant accomplice.

No more millions of words bouncing off all the kitchen walls…

…and stairway hall.

I hear the sounds…of silence.

 

Should I work or take a nap?

Or a steamy bubble bath?

And the bathrooms, they are clean..ish.

The floor’s not strewn with dirty dish..es.

No more re-corded episodes of 19 Kids and Counting! What a joy!

There’s no more noise.

I hear the sounds…of silence.

 

The Worst Housekeeper in the World

“What a dump!”

Bette Davis must have been visiting my house when she uttered those famous words.  Ugh.  I’ve always been a neat freak; not a clean freak, but neat.  I like things in their place.  It doesn’t have to be spotless; I just don’t want it to look like an episode of “Extreme Hoarders.”

But I have a kid…and a husband.  For a while, I could still keep up.  I mean, when the kid can’t crawl, there are only so many messes she can make!  Even up until she was about four or five, I was in good shape.  And Don was great about picking up after himself until Tessa started leaving things lying around.  You know, follow the leader, monkey see monkey do, and all that jazz.  But now…

I know kids make messes and I know that husbands do, too.  Yes, that’s part of the problem.  But here’s the real problem: I’ve lost my mojo.  That innate ability to keep the dirt swept up and the countertops clean and the cat litter changed… I’ve gotten lazy(er).  I don’t want to do anything.

 It takes me FOREVER to clean a room!  Today, I’ve managed to clean one bathroom and started the dishwasher.  And the fact that I’m on here now writing this instead of cleaning something else should be ignored!

I need to get my groove back.  Maybe I’ll go to Jamaica like Stella did to find it!  Or maybe I’ll just sit around like Bette, smoke a long cigarette in a holder, and complain about the condition of my surroundings.  What. A. Dump.

Homework Bill of Rights - First Draft

All right, friends...here it is.  The Homework Bill of Rights.  Take a gander, see how it reads, and give me some feedback.  Once we have it down pat, I'll publish it so you can use or share as you please.  My teacher friends, your input would be especially helpful!  If there are thing you wish your students and/or their parents knew, include them. 

HOMEWORK BILL OF RIGHTS

Homework is not a punishment; it is a chance to grow.

 

1.       If you are not sure how to answer a question; you may ask for help; however, I will not answer it for you.

2.       You are responsible for making sure all homework is complete and assignment book is signed.

3.       If you have tried your best to answer a question and still cannot, I will help you find how to answer the question; again, I will not answer it for you.

4.       You are responsible for bringing home any books needed to complete homework. Failure to do so results in late homework and the consequences that brings at school.  After three times, you will also receive a consequence at home.

5.       A study time of 15 minutes is needed for daily quizzes; for tests, you must study until the material is learned.  If you need help reviewing the material, we will be happy to quiz you on the facts.

6.       Recite Bible verse daily.  Your time learning God’s word is the most important thing you will do all day.

7.       Read for AR every day.  Every day you do not bring your book home, you lose 15 minutes of TV time.

8.       There will be no TV or other electronic devices allowed until homework is complete, except if the computer is needed for research.

9.       Calculators are not allowed for basic math problems.  Use scrap paper if needed to figure it out.

10.   Be happy!  Be thankful God has provided for you to attend a Christian school.

11.   Remember that you are loved.   We are here to help you be the best you can be, but we can’t do it for you.  Make good choices!

If at First You Don't Succeed, Ask Mom

Everyone out there knows what it’s like to watch someone you love struggle.  If you’re a parent, it’s even harder.  You want your child to do their very best and excel at everything, but you also want them to be independent and responsible for their own achievements.  It’s a very fine line between not doing enough for them and doing too much.

I bring this up for a reason.  We’re barely into the second week of school and we’re already struggling.  Last week, Tessa forgot to bring home her math book and therefore, couldn’t finish her homework.  She had to go in early to get it done.  Tonight, she had Science homework that included fill-in-the-blank questions.  I asked if she had notes from class or her Science book with her and the answer once again was “no.” 

Her excuse was this: “I thought you would know the answers.”  Well, yes…I guess I could get the answers.  I mean, it’s been 40 years since I’ve been in Fourth grade and I don’t really remember facts about ecosystems, but I’m sure I could wing it or Google it.  But should I? 

Am I teaching her anything if I let her get by with forgetting textbooks or using a calculator or asking me how to spell words?  Exactly what is my limit of required parental assistance?  Do I micromanage her homework and check all the answers for accuracy, or do I simply make sure she completes it all?

These are tough questions, folks.  I know many, many, many parents before me have struggled with the same issues.  I don’t know if there’s any right answer for it.  Maybe it’s just what’s right for your particular child. 

I’ve decided that I’m going to write a list.  Call it a Bill of Homework Rights.  I’ll list the things that she, as the child, is entitled to in the way of homework assistance.  I’ll also include the limits that I, as the parent, have in regards to giving answers.  I have in a few in mind, but I need more.

Those of you out there who have already made this journey can help.  What would you put in this Bill of Rights?  What would you leave out?  How did you handle this problem? Feel free to comment here or on Facebook.  I’d love to hear your answers.

On the bright side, we only have eight more years until she graduates!  Now, let’s talk about college…

The Crazies Have Taken Over the Funny Farm

OK…I know I moan and groan a lot on here about my family.  But the truth of the matter is I love them.  Period.  There’s no conditions, no hesitations, no requirements…just pure, never-ending love.  That being said, GOOD LORD, THESE PEOPLE MADE ME CRAZY THIS WEEKEND!!!

Well, that was cathartic.

Here’s the deal: I have menopause-itis and I have it bad.  There was nothing said or done this weekend that didn’t irritate me.  I wanted to climb in bed and not climb out until the hubby and kid left for work/school tomorrow morning.  The noise, the rough-housing, the teasing, the noise...I already said that one, didn’t I?

Sigh.  The thing is, I know it wasn’t their fault.  My mom used to tell me, “If you think everyone else is crazy, it might be you.”  Huh, now that I type that, there’s a whole lot of stuff about her that makes sense.  Anyhoo…she was right on this one.  Everyone else in the world can’t be wrong all at the same time.  And I can’t be the only person in the world who’s right.  (Actually, I’m pretty sure I can, but I’ll exercise pretend humility for this post.) ;-)

I hate being this way as much as I hate seeing Tessa be this way.  I complain about her hormones and then mine seize my brain and I act the same.  I’ve been pretty close to one of her massive melt-downs myself.  And I truly do feel bad when I snap at both of them.  I don’t stop, of course, but I do feel bad.

I like to think that God gave women these problems because we’re the stronger sex.  Think about it…it takes a lot of strength and determination to go through 40+/- years of monthly periods, childbirth, a life-time of child-rearing (cause that never stops, you know) and menopause.  It takes a toll on our body, our mind, and our spirit.  It’s HARD, y’all.

Now that everyone’s settling down for the night, I can unwind and prepare myself for the week ahead.  It should be a good week:  Lunch with one bestie tomorrow and another bestie’s birthday on Wednesday.  I just need to get past my own self and I’ll be fine.

At least that’s what the crazy people keep telling me.

 

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to School...

FREEDOM! Ahhh…that glorious word!  I’ve been waiting three months for this day.  The day I finally get to clean my house and enjoy my coffee and watch something on TV other than Disney.  And finally, it is here.

What’s that?  You say I didn’t get my freedom today?  You say I actually spent it in the company of a nine-year-old who refused to go to school today?  Oh…that’s right; TESSA DIDN’T GO TO SCHOOL TODAY.

Sigh…the second day of school and it’s already begun.  And before you say it, nine times out of ten, I would make her go no matter what.  But today, I could tell where this mood was heading.  And I was right; we ended up in a full-fledged, hormone-induced, one-hour crying jag.

Ugh.  We’d already gone through this a few nights ago.  Tessa had twisted her foot and it was hurting her.  So naturally, she cried.  And cried.  And cried.  Pretty soon, she wasn’t even crying about her foot.  Even SHE didn’t know why she was crying!  It lasted for TWO HOURS.  By the time she finally fell to sleep, I was exhausted.  I ended up sleeping with her in her room.  The next day, she was fine.

To be fair, she was indeed a little sick last night.  I don’t know if it was the pizza she ate Sunday night or if she had a bit of a bug, but she spent a good part of the evening enjoying the view from the bathroom.  So she didn’t feel up to par when she went to bed.  But she fell asleep well and slept through the night.

This morning, when I went to wake her, I knew it was going to be a tough one.  I had to practically drag her downstairs Dagwood-style.  When I told her it was time to get ready, her eyes watered and got red and she had THAT look.  When her Dad told her to get ready, the sobs began.  She stood in the bathroom with a toothbrush in her mouth, bawling.  After five minutes of this, it became apparent this day wasn’t going to go as I had planned.

I sent Don to work, sent her teacher an e-mail and took her to her room.  The rules of the day were simple: no TV, no computer, no DS, and no playing outside the bed.  She could sleep, read, draw, or clean her pigsty  room.  She did go back to sleep for a couple of hours and awoke in a much improved mood.  I suggested going to school late, but that idea was quickly nixed.

She did follow the rules today and she even helped me around the house, cleaning her bathroom, setting the table, doing laundry.  We ate lunch at the dining room table instead of in front of the TV; we cleaned off her homework desk so it would be ready for the school year; we did play a couple of board  games, but only after the school day was officially over…so it ended up being an OK day after all.

That being said, TOMORROW I WANT MY FREEDOM!!  Oh wait…the HVAC guy will be here ALL day.

Sigh…