Small-town Crime

I was mugged last night.   Accosted, even.  Blindsided.  At the least, bullied.  And by a much younger, and much bigger girl.  A friend.  Someone I’ve cared for and nurtured.  And for no apparent reason!  I’m physically hurt, yes; but even more, my heart is hurt.  Shelby, how could you do this????

Shelby behaving properly for Don.  Of course.

Ok, so may it wasn’t exactly like I said.  But it still hurt!  You see, the hubs had to work late last night.  Me, being the ever-helpful, wonderful, caring wife that I am (ahem), decided to feed the horses for him.  I’ve done it many, many times, with no incident.  I’ve lugged feed, hauled hay, slogged through mud and rain, just to feed these “gentle” giants of ours.  Last night started out much the same.  It had rained earlier, so the ground was muddy.  I had the Pavlovian red bucket filled with feed and had ventured inside the pasture to get their feed pans.  (The horses are notorious for kicking the bucket, if you will, and strewing them around the field.) 

When I stepped inside the gate, the horses came running.  They have gotten greedy with their food, and were past ready to eat.  I shooed them away so I could get past them, and they moved obligingly.  After that is a blur.  I had walked about ½-way down the fence line when Jesse, the gelding, took off to the left of me, far out of reach and danger.  The next thing I knew, Shelby, the mare, crashed into my right shoulder, sending me flying through the air, landing face down in the mud with my right arm under my ribs.  I immediately covered my head, anticipating the 1,000 pounds of muscle that I expected to land on me.  THANK GOD, she didn’t trample me!

I knew I wasn’t hurt bad, but my ribs were hurting like mad!  Eventually, I realized I had just had the breath knocked out of me, but I was still in pain.  I limped into the house, where my daughter helped me undress and I climbed into the shower.  I had mud plastered to my knees, my arms, and was spitting mud out of my mouth.  Yuck…pasture mud…you see what I’m saying here??

Anyhoo…I stayed on the sofa last night and then crawled into bed, trying to get as comfortable as possible.  This morning, my neck  stiff and my right arm is basically useless.  It’s not broken; where she hit my shoulder and I landed on that arm, it’s just really stiff and sore.  Today has been a mix of Aleve, heating pad, and whining.

My problem is this – I have no visible injuries except an elbow with road rash.  Or mud rash.  Whatever.  All my injuries are muscular.  So my complaining seems like exaggeration and my family has already tired of me.  So I will bite my tongue, ignore the EXCRUIATING pain (see…no exaggeration here); and resume my duties as house slave.  No, no…don’t worry – I’ll be FINE*.

 

*FINE – a woman’s way of saying, “Things are totally NOT fine, but I will martyr myself for the good of the family.”